Don't Let The Rain Stop You

I recently enjoyed one of the most relaxed Friday’s I’ve had in a while. After leading a 5 am prayer call, I decided to take a break from my usual Friday exercise routine.  Actually, I went to my yoga and kickboxing classes the prior evening so I decided to go walking in my favorite park with our dog, Leo. Upon leaving home, the rain clouds started to form in the sky.  My first response was to turn around and go back home, but I heard the Spirit say, "Don't let the rain stop you." 

When we arrived, I grabbed my umbrella and started walking. As we walked, of course it started to rain. While walking I saw others running and walking in the rain and I began to fully take in the scenery of my favorite park.

The morning's rain was a cleansing, refreshing rain and I truly enjoyed it. After my walk in the rain, I enjoyed a facial at my favorite spa and later enjoying my time at my favorite Friday appointment, you guessed it, the hair salon.

Sitting in the hair salon, I could see the rain clouds rolling away and the sun burst through into a beautiful bright day! The moral of this story is, “Don't let the rain stop you:”

• Keep your plans even if you have to make an adjustment.

• Keep an umbrella somewhere close; expect some rain every now and then.

• Keep a positive mental attitude and become fully present in the moment.

• Keep a good walking companion, one that can handle a little rain (like Leo).

The rain does not last forever, so enjoy your day even if you have to endure a little rain….

Dr. Toni

www.drtonialvarado.com

The Power of Connection

This week, I had the privilege of speaking to a dynamic audience of women in Atlanta at the Pink Power MasterMind Conference for Women. It was an amazing gathering of women from all walks of life. The conference was packed with powerful speakers with the sole purpose of empowering women to own their unique power to lead. One of my takeaways from the conference was the idea that women are more powerful when we connect with the right agenda, motives and persons.

Connectivity is the state or quality of being connected. It suggests that we do not exist outside of our communities and our communities do not exist outside of our influence.  We each bring something unique to the table and without the uniqueness that each person brings our communities are impoverished.

During the Pink Power Conference, I sat through some great presentations and listened to a wealth of insight and knowledge that was applicable to my own life and work.  I celebrated with women who were being honored for their accomplishments in the community and workplace. 

What I appreciated the most about the conference was the unselfish sharing of information and resources that assisted women in being successful in business, entrepreneurship, and life in general. I laughed, cried and rejoiced as women shared candidly from their stories of struggle and triumph in business. While I too was there to share as a speaker, I also came away empowered to accomplish and be all that God has created me to be.

Here’s what I leave with you:

• Find a group of positive people and connect on a common goal or similar passion. 
• Be your authentic self and show up every time you are needed in a particular setting. 
• Trust what’s inside of you and pour out freely because the community desperately needs what you have to offer. 
• Celebrate the gifts, opportunities and uniqueness of others and remain open to what they can offer you.

It's the Power of Connection!

Dr. Toni

www.drtonialvarado.com

It's Mind Over Matter

I’m having the most amazing fitness summer! This year I decided to increase my level of fitness. I’m taking a different approach by trying new sports and participating in fitness classes that I once avoided.  One of the fitness classes is the "dreaded" spin class.  Admittedly, I attended a spin class many years ago and vowed that I would never do it again. Because of that one experience (that I did not enjoy), I convinced myself that this activity was not designed for me. After years of watching others go in and out of spin classes excited about their experience, I finally mustered up enough courage to try it again.  I’m happy to say, I conquered my fear of spin and it is now a class that I truly enjoy!

In addition to spin classes, I’m regularly attending kickboxing, strength training and yoga classes. I enjoy bike riding in my favorite parks and because I live in Georgia, hiking, running and walking at Stone Mountain Park has become one of my favorite routines. While it is challenging, I enjoy every moment of it! Whether, I am training with fitness coach, LaTasha Lewis at Tadda’s Fitness Camp or on my own, I can hear her voice encouraging me with the words; “It’s mind over matter.”

I am very active on social media, often posting about my exercise and wellness routines. Because of the things I post about my own fitness journey, people have been inspired and many have started exercising due to my example.  I wish I could boast that I never get tired or experience moments when I do not want to work out.  It is not easy to get out of bed before dawn, especially when you manage a busy family and lifestyle such my own.

Over the years I have developed a thinking skill that is vital to my success in every area of life. Here’s what I have learned:

      Be Quick To Think Differently - I have learned to lasso negative thoughts before they dominate my mind. One of my best practices is the recitation of scripture and famous quotes that teaches me to think in a positive manner.

         Focus On The Big Picture  – When working out, I focus my mind on the benefits of a healthy lifestyle and away from the temporary pain or struggle I may be experiencing at the time. When I view the workout as a necessary component to my overall health plan, I am able to make direct correlations between my thought patterns and my ability to accomplish the task at hand. 

     Train Your Mind To Think Positively - So many times we set out to accomplish something difficult and immediately negative thoughts will take over causing us to quit.  Training your body requires that you train your mind. Thinking positively about what you are doing gives you the energy and strength that you will need to finish well.

While your workout or whatever you are facing may be difficult and challenging, at the end of the day, you have what it takes to meet every challenge. Whether it is exercise, healthy eating, accomplishing a task related to a goal, school, or work, how we think really affects our ability to accomplish our dreams. I leave you with one of my favorite Biblical passages for your meditation, “Begin to think on the Word or begin to sing a praise song to God. Make a conscious effort to fill your mind with good, pure, wholesome, and lovely thoughts (Philippians 4:8 Amp. Version).

Remember, ‘It’s Mind Over Matter!’

Dr. Toni

www.drtonialvarado.com

Harmony Trumps Balance: I’m Going for Harmony in My Life!

For many years I sought to strike a healthy balance between my marriage, family, work and personal pursuits.  I’m often asked the infamous balance question, “Dr. Toni, How do you balance all of the things you do? You’re a wife, mother, pastor, CEO of a Non-Profit, college professor, coach, businesswoman and itinerant preacher and speaker. How in the world do you do it?” My response to that question heretofore has been the typical balance response of making sure I have good time management and good team of people around me to aid me in all of my responsibilities and a good wellness plan that keeps me healthy and fit.

While all of these things are necessary to strive for what we call “balance”, I want to offer a different word that might shift the conversation in the direction of something more attainable for those who wear many hats. While it may appear to most that I have mastered this thing called balance, I too have asked this meaningful question to others who appear to have it more together than myself.  I have taught seminars and workshops on “the balancing act”, only to struggle with the elusive ideal of “balance” in my own life. 

The word balance suggests that we are in a constant state of equilibrium with an equal distribution of weight and tension. When in fact life is not easily packaged in equal amounts of experiences and responsibilities. The truth is, we are always in a state of flux trying to decide the proper amount of attention to give to the various aspects of our lives.  The challenge with balance is that it is a moving target and just when I think I have mastered it, the target moves and I have to make the right decision for the present moment and life issue that I’m facing.

Well, after 51 of years of being worn out from my quest for balance, I have decided to chunk the idea of maintaining balance for a more attainable virtue of maintaining harmony in my life. Just hearing the word harmony brings a sense of peace and tranquility to my mind and spirit and causes me to exhale and breathe in new life with each breath. Harmony suggests that I can bring the different parts of my life together into consistent orderly agreement and practical congruity.

Here’s are 11 things I have discovered about how to bring and maintain harmony into your life:

• Accept who you are with all your gifts, skills, strengths and weaknesses.  Engage in a self-awareness process with a coach or mentor so you can walk away appreciating who you are and all that you have experienced.
• Learn to love yourself. For many years, I suffered with low self-esteem because of my dark complexion and skin tone. I learned to love myself through a process of study in the word of God and mentors who spoke words that were affirming, causing me to see my own self-worth and value. You cannot love others until you discover and love the masterpiece you were created to be.
•  Do some soul searching on the things that are important you, such as your values.  Once you have discovered those things, match your gifts, skills, strength, weaknesses and values to the activities, jobs and opportunities that are consistent with who you are and what’s important to you.
• Prioritize your family and other significant relationships. Life is to be lived within the context of community.  Relationships make our lives worth living and can be a source of refreshment to our soul.
•  Rid your life of negative people and develop a network of positive forward thinking people. Don’t waste your time trying to make others value you. Allow the work that you do speak and open the right doors of opportunity for you.
• Develop a self-care regiment that is consistent with the things you enjoy. A good self-care plan includes, exercise, healthy eating, rest, relaxation and plain old fun! One of my favorite lines of the flight attendant speech is “In the event of an emergency an oxygen mask will descend. Place your own mask on first before helping those around you." You really can’t take care of the people in your life if you neglect to care for your self.
• Learn to enjoy new things so you don’t become stale and monotonous in your routines.  Get a hobby, learn a new skill, visit a new city or country, try a new dish or restaurant and live life to its fullest.
• Be quick to forgive offenses. Don’t burn bridges because you never know when you may have to cross them again. Get the necessary counsel to help you get over disappointment and pain and keep it moving!
• Don’t be a people pleaser.  If there is one thing that will clutter your life and keep you on a never ending treadmill, it is the idea of being a people pleaser.  You can never satisfy the whimsical indifferences of people. Rather than be tethered to the opinions of people it is better to pay close attention to your own desires, pursue your own goals and follow the path that has been carved out especially for you.
• Develop Your A-Game. Become one of the best in your field and do your best work while doing it. Sharpen your skills by learning from others who are good at their game too.
•  Discover Your A-Team. Find those people who have been called alongside you to help you accomplish those God size dreams and visions.  Whenever your dream and vision involves helping and improving the quality of life for others, it will require people with different and more skill sets than can be embodied in one person.

Life is like a score of music, with simultaneous combinations of tones and rhythms.  Like music, that when blended together into the right chordal structure becomes a melodious masterpiece that is pleasing to the ear, our lives can be lived in a way that makes the chaos of our lives come together in a melody of rhythms that are unique to who we are and what we are destined to be and do.

Since life happens simultaneously, meaning that we live, work and play in the same lifetime, we must discover ways to blend the various parts of our lives into a melodious structure of chords and tones that flow simultaneously. Just like the score of music determines the notes, rhythms, rest points, moods, feelings and crescendos of a musical masterpiece, our lives can be conducted in a manner that gives room to each movement at the right moments, in the right places, with the right people in harmony with our purpose.

Blessings….

Dr. Toni

www.drtonialvarado.com

April Showers Bring May Flowers…

You’ve heard it said, “April Showers Bring May Flowers.” This statement is certainly true in my life. The Month of May is always filled with joy and laughter for me.  Besides the fact that my birthday is May 16^th, I’m always excited about celebrating life and motherhood with my own Mom, sisters and children.  

May is also the month that My Sister’s Keeper Foundation for Women reaches out to the community to serve mothers of children who are hospitalized at Children’s Healthcare of Atlanta-Egleston Hospital on Mother’s Day weekend. MSK has also has chosen to honor the women who have completed our 9 month Leadership and Life Coaching Program, award women in our program with financial scholarships toward their education and professional development, and assist single mothers with extra-curricular and summer camp vouchers for their children.

Last year, I celebrated my 50^th birthday with a Fabulous and Fierce Birthday Gala and fundraiser for My Sister’s Keeper Foundation for Women.  I am still enjoying fond memories and pictures from this momentous event a year later. You may ask why I chose to celebrate my birthday giving back to women and why each year I look for new ways to advance and empower women in my community?  I’m not sure of all of the implications.  However, I believe my opening statement speaks to the heart of why I have chosen to live my life in this manner.

 

I have experienced many moments and seasons where it seemed that life was not treating me fair.  I’ve had rainy seasons and times when I thought I was being over-looked and forgotten. I can relate to failure and struggle and times of confusion where I needed clarity concerning my purpose. But in all that I have accomplished and overcome, I realize as I approach my 51^st birthday, that it was the rainy seasons of my life that have produced the flowers that I enjoy now.  

It was the showers of failing at my first attempt at college that has produced the flowers of education and the opportunities that are afforded to me as result of the degrees I now hold. It was the lessons learned from past hurts and failed relationships that produced the flowers of healthy relationships with my husband, children, mother, sisters, girlfriends and countless women that I now coach and mentor.

The month of May is a month that I have chosen to celebrate all of life. Whether bad or good, life is worth celebrating.  Not only have I chosen to celebrate me, I have chosen to celebrate you! For whether you realize it or not, it is the rainy seasons of your life that has produced the most growth you could ever imagine. Enjoy this season and every season because, “April Showers 'really do' Bring May Flowers!”

Blessings…

Dr. Toni

www.drtonialvarado.com

www.mskfoundation.org

www.coachingmomentswithdrtoni.com

The New Year Brings New Opportunities

With each passing year we get older and wiser.  Many begin the year with resolutions about their health, money and relationships.  Some begin the year with resolutions about their education, personal and professional development.  What I enjoy most about beginning a brand new year is the opportunities that come within that year.

This year I’m particularly excited about the opportunities that I have been afforded to expand the reach of my non-profit work in empowering women.  I’m happy to announce that My Sister's Keeper Foundation For Women will partner with the Bonner Scholars Program of Spelman College in Atlanta, Georgia. This partnership will afford MSK the opportunity to coach a focus group of seniors who will be graduating Spring 2014.

Like MSK, here are a few things you can do to prepare yourself to seize new opportunities:

• Resolve that whatever you did not accomplish last year can still be accomplished.
• Revisit past opportunities to assess what new opportunities may exist.
• Sharpen your skills through coaching, education, professional development and training opportunities.
• Synergize your efforts by partnering with people and volunteering in organizations with similar focus and passion.

Historically, Spelman College has prepared some of the brightest young women who go on to impact their communities and society at large.  What a great opportunity for MSK to coach these young women. As you progress through this year look for great opportunities to come your way.

Happy New Year & New Opportunities,

Dr. Toni G. Alvarado, CEO/Lead Coach

MSK Foundation

“Moving Women from Average to Excellence”

www.mskfoundation.org

www.drtonialvarado.com

2013: Lessons from An Amazing Year!

2013 was an amazing year! As I look back over the year there were many highlights.  Here are a few lessons I take with me as I transition into 2014:

• Courage Is Not The Absence of Fear.  When faced with difficult decisions, often we are gripped with fear.  When we came into this year, my husband I had to make some major leadership decisions that took much courage on our part.  We could have allowed our fears of the unknown to paralyze us, leaving us stagnant and unable to move into the future.  In retrospect what seemed to be fearful decisions proved to be some of the best decisions we have made in our ministerial careers. Remember courage is not the absence of fear.  Face your fears and take courage to move forward despite your fears.
• Create Your Own Door and Walk Through It. This year I decided to expand my coaching practice.  I began the year by launching my SOAR Coaching Seminar.  I facilitated the SOAR seminars in several cities, Florida, Ohio, Concord, NC and Chicago. In addition to the SOAR seminars, I launched the TLCC Accelerated Coach Training Course. Because I had the courage to create my own door others have opened new doors for me to walk through in 2014!
• Celebrate You! I came into 2013 excited about turning 50 this year.  On May 16^th I turned 50 and on May 24^th I hosted my Fabulous, Fierce & Fifty Birthday Gala! I celebrated my birthday as a fundraiser for My Sister’s Keeper Foundation for Women with family and friends from far and near.  I took the time to celebrate my accomplishments and the work of empowering women. I also took the time to appreciate the special women in my life in an All White Fabulous & Fierce Brunch. You can't always wait on someone else to throw you a party.  At particular junctures in your life it becomes necessary to pat yourself on the back and appreciate the roads you have traveled.  I have fond memories and pictures from that entire weekend.  It was certainly one of the highlights of my year!
• Celebrate Milestones. Another highlight of 2013 was the 20^th Wedding Anniversary and Vow Renewal celebration with my husband, Johnathan Alvarado! We renewed our wedding vows on the backdrop of a romantic beach sunset in Punta Cana, Dominican Republic in the presence of couples that traveled to celebrate with us.  We also exchanged new rings as a symbol of the love and growth we have experienced in our marriage of 20 years.
• Cherish The People Who Mean The Most To You.  Among all the excitement of this year, there have been moments of sadness when people passed on from this life. As a pastor I had to stand with those who lost loved ones both young and old. Some were tragic accidents while others were sudden deaths due to illness that took their loved ones unaware.  Some are left with unanswered questions and feelings of despair.  While others found comfort in just knowing that their loved ones were no longer suffering the pains of their illness. Yet, in each case there seemed to be a wish for more time to share and spend with loved ones.  I’ve decided to live every day like it’s my last and to cherish every moment I have with the people who mean the most to me.
• Change Your Scenery Regularly. This year I reinvigorated my value for recreation, relaxation and rest as a part of my overall value for self-care.  I’m especially proud of the fact that I vacationed several times this year with my husband, our children, my Mom and sisters.  In addition to traveling and vacationing (Punta Cana, Dominican Republic, Destin, FL, Nairobi and Nakuru, Kenya, New York City, Hilton Head, SC & Charlotte, NC) I also visited several local spas and took the necessary breaks to keep me happy and healthy.

In 2013, like every other year, there were challenges to overcome and demands to meet. Yet, because of God’s grace and a winning attitude I completed this year stronger than ever. I'm thankful for the blessings of 2013 as I look forward to more of God's grace in 2014!

Happy New Year!

Dr. Toni

www.drtonialvarado.com