Last Wednesday, May 16th, I celebrated my 49th Birthday! I started to do a new blog post on that day, but I really couldn't articulate at the moment how and what I was feeling. The truth is, I have been reflecting since last week about the word "legacy" and asking myself "What will my legacy be?"
As a coach, I have posed that question to many women. As a pastor, I have challenged my parishioners to identify and seek God for clarity. As a preacher, I have tried to stir and ignite passion in my listeners. As a wife, I have co-labored and partnered with my husband in all of his endeavors. As a mother, I share nuggets of insight and wisdom while nurturing my children's gifts and talents.
Yet, the question remains, "What will my legacy be?". It hit me today, when I thought about all of the things listed above. Legacy is the thing you do whether or not you are being paid to do it. Legacy is the reason you get out of bed in the morning. Legacy is the thing that makes you laugh, cry, angry and sad when it's missing.
Building legacy takes time. Building legacy requires patience, energy and passion. Building legacy is something you do on a daily basis.
Here's what I want my legacy to be: I lived, I loved, I
forgave, I worked hard, I played hard, I left something in this world
that made it a better place than when I found it!
Blessings....
Dr. Toni
Tuesday, May 22, 2012
Monday, May 7, 2012
The Value of Encouragement: A Lesson From My Early Morning Run
Today I woke up late for my 5:00 am run with Taddah's Fitness Camp. Actually, I set my clock to awake at 4:00 am and when the alarm went off I hit the snooze button and went back to sleep.... Don't act like you have never done that before... Lol! Well, when I finally woke up, it was 4:45 and I knew I was in trouble. I jumped out of bed and my first thought was I will never make it!
Being the determined woman that I am, I kept moving full steam ahead, got dressed and got in the car and started driving toward the camp. All the way there, I was talking to myself and upset that I had overslept and was going to be late. I told myself several times that I should turn around and give up on making it today.
When I arrived, my disappointment was exacerbated by the fact that no one was in the parking lot and I knew, the camp had gone ahead. Just when I started to turn around, I saw another woman running trying to catch up with the camp. When I saw her, I thought, I can make it!
I jumped out of the car and began my run. I could see the campers running off in the distance and the woman that was right in front of me was suddenly becoming distant too. I started to feel defeated and that I would never catch up with the camp and felt I should have turned around. Just as I was beginning to slow down in defeat, one of the trainers pulled up in a car alongside me and said, "Pastor Toni.... Is that you?"
I looked at her with tears in my eyes and said "Yes, I woke up late and I'm trying to catch up with the camp." She could hear the frustration in my voice and said "Don't worry you only have 2.5 miles and I will ride along side you until you catch up with the camp. You can make it!"
She stayed with me for a few minutes. I started to feel better. I started to feel like I could do it. She started speaking words of encouragement, like "Come on Pastor", "You can Do It!", "Relax those arms going down this hill."
Before long, the people who were afar off in the distance when I began running were coming closer into my view. Some of the people who were ahead of me when I started, I began to pass along the way and they started encouraging me. After awhile, I started seeing the finish line and I began encouraging myself, I can do it!
I finished my 2.5 mile run in less time than it would have taken me to turn around and get back home. But, I could not have made it without the encouragement that I received from the trainers and the people who were running with me.
Here are the lessons about encouragement that I gleaned from my early morning run:
Blessings.....
Dr. Toni
Being the determined woman that I am, I kept moving full steam ahead, got dressed and got in the car and started driving toward the camp. All the way there, I was talking to myself and upset that I had overslept and was going to be late. I told myself several times that I should turn around and give up on making it today.
When I arrived, my disappointment was exacerbated by the fact that no one was in the parking lot and I knew, the camp had gone ahead. Just when I started to turn around, I saw another woman running trying to catch up with the camp. When I saw her, I thought, I can make it!
I jumped out of the car and began my run. I could see the campers running off in the distance and the woman that was right in front of me was suddenly becoming distant too. I started to feel defeated and that I would never catch up with the camp and felt I should have turned around. Just as I was beginning to slow down in defeat, one of the trainers pulled up in a car alongside me and said, "Pastor Toni.... Is that you?"
I looked at her with tears in my eyes and said "Yes, I woke up late and I'm trying to catch up with the camp." She could hear the frustration in my voice and said "Don't worry you only have 2.5 miles and I will ride along side you until you catch up with the camp. You can make it!"
She stayed with me for a few minutes. I started to feel better. I started to feel like I could do it. She started speaking words of encouragement, like "Come on Pastor", "You can Do It!", "Relax those arms going down this hill."
Before long, the people who were afar off in the distance when I began running were coming closer into my view. Some of the people who were ahead of me when I started, I began to pass along the way and they started encouraging me. After awhile, I started seeing the finish line and I began encouraging myself, I can do it!
I finished my 2.5 mile run in less time than it would have taken me to turn around and get back home. But, I could not have made it without the encouragement that I received from the trainers and the people who were running with me.
Here are the lessons about encouragement that I gleaned from my early morning run:
- Encouragement can help people overcome feelings of defeat and frustration.
- Encouraging words from others can elicit encouragement from within.
- Encouragement can give you the stamina and energy needed to complete or finish a task.
- Encouragement is valuable, especially when you feel that you are behind.
- Encouragement can turn self-defeating talk into positive affirmations.
Blessings.....
Dr. Toni
Tuesday, April 24, 2012
Frame Every Failure With Success
I just returned from a women's conference where I was challenged by these words, "Frame every failure with success." As I sat there and pondered over my life I could certainly list many times in my life where I had failed. What I suddenly realized was that for every failure I could remember, there was a corresponding link to success. What makes success sweet is the bitterness of failure.
The question remained how do I frame failure with success? I've been pondering this question for the past three days and this what I have surmised:
1) Keep Moving - Don't allow your failure to paralyze you.
2) Stay Focused - Don't allow your failure to derail you.
3) Glean the Lessons - Learn from your past mistakes and allow them to inform you.
4) Remain Optimistic - Don't allow your past mistakes to define you.
5) Pass on the Wisdom - Share lessons, wisdom and insight to those coming behind you.
I'm sure there is more that I will discover as I move through life and consider this thought. The frame that we choose to place around a painting will often determine the beauty of the painting. Even a cheap picture can be ungraded to a beautiful piece of art when it's placed in the right frame.
Blessings......
Dr. Toni
"Failure is not final..... It depends on how you frame it!"
The question remained how do I frame failure with success? I've been pondering this question for the past three days and this what I have surmised:
1) Keep Moving - Don't allow your failure to paralyze you.
2) Stay Focused - Don't allow your failure to derail you.
3) Glean the Lessons - Learn from your past mistakes and allow them to inform you.
4) Remain Optimistic - Don't allow your past mistakes to define you.
5) Pass on the Wisdom - Share lessons, wisdom and insight to those coming behind you.
I'm sure there is more that I will discover as I move through life and consider this thought. The frame that we choose to place around a painting will often determine the beauty of the painting. Even a cheap picture can be ungraded to a beautiful piece of art when it's placed in the right frame.
Blessings......
Dr. Toni
"Failure is not final..... It depends on how you frame it!"
Wednesday, April 18, 2012
Welcome to Coaching Moments with Dr. Toni
We often need significant relationships to aid us in moments of intense decision making, transition and change. It is in those times when a coach can come alongside us to ask powerful questions that will lead us to greater understanding of life experiences and clarity concerning our moments.
I'm excited about sharing coaching moments from my life experiences in hopes of helping you make sense of your moments!
Blessings.....
Dr. Toni
"You are powerful beyond measure when you live your life on purpose."
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)